This is the 100th post on MirrorCracked!
Perfect timing, because Vishesh just awarded me a couple of amazing awards! I am apparently a Certified Honest Blogger, and he has extended his hands in being Blogging Friends Forever! I humbly accept the award, my dear fellow, and we shall remain Blogging Friends Forever! I am honored! π
It’s my duty to pass these awards on to a few deserving bloggers, and I think this time, I shall be very selective in whom I award this to.
Scorpria, for being Scorpria; Aparna, for being my conscience; Shivya, for being elusive; and finally, Raji, for being rude. π
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Now, let’s play a game, shall we? I was planning something interesting for the 100th post, and last night, I came up with an idea which involves everyone. I am going to spoof the Snow White fairy tale, and you’re going to help me do it. I will begin the tale and everyone who reads this, has to contribute in completing the story.
No word limits, no limits to the number of comments, no bar on language and most importantly, the story has to be funny. No serious shit. So, here goes:
nce upon a time, there lived a queen who wanted a daughter with skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood and hair as black as ebony. She prayed day and night for such a daughter and one fine day, nine months after a particularly raunchy night with the gardener, she gave birth to a beautiful daughter.
She had blood-red lips but the other two attributes were interchanged. Her skin was as black as ebony and her hair was as white as snow. The King and the Queen had decided to name her Snow White, but now,the name seemed ridiculous. So, they decided to call her Greyhound.
Grief-stricken, the Queen consumed poison and died on the occasion of Greyhound’s first birthday, and the next day, the King put up an ad in the Lonely Hearts columns, asking for an evil stepmother for his beautifully hideous daughter…
Now, continue the story while I enjoy the comforts of cloud Number Nine. !00 posts! Wow! Never thought I’d last this long! π
Thanks everyone!
But little did the king know that behind the hideous appearance of his daughter, God had given him a wonderful gift. He would know it only when she grows up with utmost care and pamper. If king by any chance did anything to hurt the poor child. Poof! she would just disappear in the sky.
And hey, congrates man! π no not on 100th post, but for the award… yo should congrates us for reading all your posts religiously! π π
A beautiful woman came to the palace on reading the ad.. and went to meet the King and his daughter. On seeing the daughter, she passed a nasty remark, which inturn hurt the daughter’s feelings (yes she could understand things at that age! :D) No no I’m not gonna kill her yet.. she weeped..
btw congratss… !!!!
for ur posts and award .. u deserve it.. ur posts are really worth reading.. !!! i love readin em .. π
ha well he got a suitable wife and he got busy..he took tips by reading Enchantress of Bollywood…The wife,is like Katrina Kaif and can’t act…and the girl is Deepika(only thing this one’s brighter) so well,he thinks himself to be Vijay Mallaya, and that he can owe everything…but the Girl gets pissed off and after going to Kerala Nambuthri(Akshaya Kumar) she summons her moms ghost…The ghost takes over the wife’s body and plans to get its revenge..but then the king gets wise and adds poison to into his wife’s beer…but well the ghost becomes even cleverer and in the last second escapes and the wife dies…the king is enraged and decides to summon a ghost buster…Imran khan…Who uses his cat attack(mew,mew) to chase away the ghost…the daughter gets damn pissed and summons Abi (small B ) who starts dancing…then to top it a stream of hopeless movies are run through…the king dies of hopeless movies heart induction over population syndrome and the daughter takes over the kingdom..but then the ghost of the mom,takes over the daughter and runs the country…again the daughter is pissed off,this time they get SRK ,who uses his abs to take the queen away…finally the minister( Akshaya Khanna) kills everyone and claims himself to be the king…And the story ends with a mystery girl coming in …so that they can have a part 2 π
even more hideous was the stepmother who was called Mamta Bannerjee by all those who loved her. The king’s heart melted when he first saw her but basically he was desperate and even Mayawati would have been fine for him. He approached her and wanted to embrace her when she yelled, “Nooohi, don’t step on my land”. The king fainted and was admitted to TaTa Hospital. Meanwhile, Mamta rightfully applied Singur…Sindoor on her forehead while Greyhound lay on her bed taking fashion tips from Paris Hilton. Just then, there was a knock on her door…
how will this work!
The Public Moron was at the door. He called for Mamata’s bluff. She was in the buff while applying Singur to her forehead, and put on a fig leaf from Farmers’ Interest, a showroom for the bankrupt.
Mamata got dressed and opened the door a wee bit. She saw Lord Buddha standing behind the Public Moron, and promptly slammed the door.
The sound woke up Greyhound, and she had a brainwave: why not join the Socialist Party? That way she could watch the hairs of the Public Moron turn white, and she could blacken everyone’s face. This way, she thought, no one would think I look odd. I will belong, and be the Princess.
As for Mamata, she thought…
First congrats on your 100th post, will do the story as well in sometime.
@Sakhi
LOL… Thanks! And yes, congrats for staying sane for a 100 posts! π
@Anu
Thanks!! π
And interesting story… π
@Vishesh
LOL… Oh my god! What a story!! Ram Gopal Verma, where are you?? π
@Kartikey
LOL.. Beats me! π
@Rambodoc
Hahaha!! I expected nothing less from you!! π
@Deeps
Thanks!! π
Congratulations and keep going strong! Now for the continuation of the story.
The king found a new wife but she was too small so she had to use the ladder to reach the king so she was called the step-queen or step-mother of Grayhound.
This time round the king wanted to have a son but again the gardener intervened!
They never could have a son because…..
GUYS CAN ONLY ADOPT!!!!
I hope you find it funny.Have a nice day like me in Bangalore!
congrats nikhil for writing on! you are quite prolific! and this avatar photo is much better than the previous one. congrats for getting the awards.
I still cant get over Vishesh’s story…!!! LOL.
Congrats, dude. 100 is an awesome number.
And after having played this game endlessly on pagalguy, lemme give u a tip to help it work. Change the rules to such that each addition to the story should be only one sentence long.
Hey Nikhil, Congrats on the award. Your Greyhounded snow white story involving the queen and the gardner (which sounds like an inspiration from some pr0n) was very funny in itself. It may be difficult for me to continue this, but I will give it a try and post back my story here.
The evil queen who applied for the post had skin blacker and hair whiter than the daughter. This made the King take poison on the daughter’s second birthday. But by then they had their second daughter who also coincidentially inherited the mother’s and the half sister’s unique features. Together they lived as a happy multi-colored family. The End.
Congrats Nikhil for the hundredth post and the award!
Congrats Nikhil for the 100th post and the award.
Greyhound had super powers at the age of one. She could talk, think and act like a 27 year old of either gender – man or woman! Greyhound’s sensory intuition told her that her fairy godmother was waiting to hatch from the pumpkin in the garden. The fairy godmother granted her one wish. Greyhound wished to write a blog, and asked her fairy godmother for a wish.
& that is the story of how mirror cracked was born! π
Doesn’t make much sense to me when I re-read it now, but hey! Its a poof, i mean, a spoof! π
Congrats on the awards.. and thanks for graciously passing it on! π
Congrats!!
“No serious shit.”
I give up! I cant create with so much rules! π
Congratulations and celebrations π
My creative juices have run out…lemme come back later π
@Krsnaknows
Welcome to MirrorCracked!
Thanks, you have a nice day too! I’m glad you like it here… And LOL at your story!
@Nita
Thanks so much! π
And as I told Sakhi, congrats on retaining your sanity for 100 posts so far!
@Deeps
LOL… I know!!!
@Avionic Spanker
Ah, I wish I had thought of that sooner! Thanks!!
@Dinesh Babu
LOL… It’s not porn, trust me!
Take your time!
@Ms Cris
Hehehehe…!! Good one!
Thanks!! π
@Chirax
Thanks!!
@Aparna
Oh my god!! How did you know!?? Who told you the story behind MirrorCracked!
And, thanks!
@Reema
Spoilsport!! π
And, thanks! π
@Smita
Hahaha! Thanks! π
Take your time!
π and i have been rolling away yet again!!!!
heartiest congratulations on the happy hundred!! and on the awards!! π
Congrats… and since i’m gonna restart the story, dont be pissed off…
The cute little greyhound used to play with the maids in the castle and learnt leading life the tough way… stumbling upon stairs, slipping on marble floors, stamping her own leg… all this because, the queen’s ghost shot her with a leg-locking curse which did only half the job… the poor gal read only 6th part of Harry Potter and was amazed at Sectum Sempra… so she took the help of the backyard albino “Bald-e-Fart” and learnt the curse… feeling brave she managed sighting her ghost mother and readied her wand… just as she was about to shoot, Eragon came on his dragon and took the gal away… when the poor gal saw Eragon, she forgot everything… the dragon rider had pests in his mind at tht time and stood upon his flying dragon and asked the gal for her hand… the gal stood up, eragon bent down, took her hand and was abt to kiss it… the proud dragon was annoyed with this filthy piece of cream-tar being her soul-mate’s soul-mate and flew beneath a dead banyan tree. the gal was standing mesmerised and forgot to avoid a branch which eventually managed to hit the gal WHAM on her face and BINGO! the dragon celebrated… π every one thought the gal was dead for many years… but eventually it was found out that she managed to blacken her hair, lighten her skin and was found dancing for the song “Hont Rasieley” in the movie “Welcome”… π
One evening, Grey hound was having her drinks (at that age, becuz she even behaved like a 27 yr old) and happened to meet Nikhil Kumar who was busy taking the pictures of Page 3 chicks. Grey Hound immediately fell in love with him, but little did she know that he was Gods yo-yo. Anything or anyone surrounding him was subjected to undergo the yo-yo fate. Nikhil was desparate to get hooked with someone and eventually they both got married. But before marriage, Nikhil demanded Mirror Cracked from Grey hound as his dowry. To this Grey Hound and her family objected as they didnt believe in dowry system. Nikhil stole the blog from Grey Hound and fled to Bangalore, India. Grey hound was devastated, she realised that Nikhil Kumar was in love only with Mirror Cracked and not with her.
Damn! Harsha commented by the time I finished and published it. My story is the continuation from Aparna, comment 18.
Anyway, congratttts buddy for the award and the 100th post. May we see more of mirror cracking here π
Congrats dude… Keep rocking π
I regret I can’t continue the story, If I continue may be it will turn out like vimal’s comment π
congrats dude!
Hey, Congratulations!!! Great going! π
Congrats on the 100th post
As for the story, I thought of continuing from the previous comment but there are just too many to choose from , so here i start my own continuation π
Renien pom, saw the add on lonely hearts. .She was enthralled to see it ,all her life she wanted to become an evil stepmom .She put on her black cloak picked her apple pie’s , fixed her false mole to see the kind . The king fell in love with her ( no not because of the apple in the pie but because of the butter in the pie ) . They married the next day .
Much to greyhound’s dismay , Renien Pom used all that the “evil stepmom” grad school had taught her on greyhound.But greyhound was smart , she outsourced all her work to maids in the palace
Soon greyhound grew
and the black started to turn into blue
And the white started to have different shades of hue
Congrats!
Does everyone celebrate the bloggiversaries? I must be getting close to 1200 soon.
‘Professor X, from the School for Gifted Youngsters saw this ad. Even though he resisted his initial temptations to apply as stepmother, he wrote a letter to the King suggesting that the kid was indeed a mutant. The King laughed at the suggestion and tore the letter. At the age of 12, GreyHound demonstrated her mutant powers by bringing climatic changes thus bringing forward the best harvest for over a century. The King wrote a letter back to Professor X realizing that he had been wrong and GreyHound was sent to the school. She has since then been an integral part of X-men as Storm.
hey nikhil, can i have your chatting id? π
Woohoo!! congratulations for your 100 posts and for the awards! Glad i decided to check-in today as I’ve been away for quite some time, else, i would have missed such an important day!! π
your story would require some thinking to complete, and i hardly have brains, so may not be a good piece of assignment for me! but vishesh was hilarious!!!
congrats on scoring a century π
after reading so many twists, turns and thoughts i’ve got no energy left for story telling π
Congrats on your 100th! and your awards.
Am pretty bad at story writing. Will stick to reading and commenting π And I definitely will suck at continuing this thread of the story!! π
boss, planning to be second Ishmeet? Your “girl fans” are increasing day by day. .. this is not good..
where is Arvind !!!!
Hey COngrats for ur 100th post :DDDD
story writing next time π
Congrats dude… I am tired to writing stories online π¦
Congrats bud!!! for the story, spare me…. I mean I am sparing myself.. scandalous stuffs won’t be encouraged by moralists (if they exist on blogs as well) I guess *wink wink* …Enjoy…
Hi, this is Anwin from the indiblogger team. I was wondering if you will be there at the kolkata bloggers meet on Sep 21. It would be great to meet you and other bloggers from Kolkata.
More details and to sign up visit http://www.indiblogger.in/bloggermeet.php?id=14
Cheers,
Anwin (Indiblogger)
forgot to say CONGRATS !!
…and King married a ‘would be step mother’ who he thought would be the evil mother because of the same black color, next day dark queen poisoned the king and now the queen put up an ad in the Lonely Hearts columns and found a black man, who will become the new king, the watchful guardian, who will be ‘THE DARK KNIGHT’…
(Greyhound will get a role in sequel, Starring Hell.le Bare.y )
Oh Forgot…!
Congrats on your 100th post.
too many milestones happening macha!! Congrats!!! π
I am still hung onto Vishesh’s story !DAMN GOOOOOODDD
π
Congrats on your 100th man…lets hear it for Nikhil…and waiting for 100th…
BTW…I am gonna continue YOUR story, coz, well its YOUR 100th post…
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nce upon a time, there lived a queen who wanted a daughter with skin as white as snow, lips as red as blood and hair as black as ebony. She prayed day and night for such a daughter and one fine day, nine months after a particularly raunchy night with the gardener, she gave birth to a beautiful daughter.
She had blood-red lips but the other two attributes were interchanged. Her skin was as black as ebony and her hair was as white as snow. The King and the Queen had decided to name her Snow White, but now,the name seemed ridiculous. So, they decided to call her Greyhound.
Grief-stricken, the Queen consumed poison and died on the occasion of Greyhoundβs first birthday, and the next day, the King put up an ad in the Lonely Hearts columns, asking for an evil stepmother for his beautifully hideous daughterβ¦
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and then there was this lady from chennai
with jasmine flowers and hair dripping in “ennai”
she thought she’d fit the bill
coz she had a stench that cud kill
but the king rejected her coz he was a “vennai”
next came dear momta di fresh from the fracas at singur
anger and malice till the tips of her li’l finger
though she was bad and bought a lot of “mishti”
to marry her, he thought, it would be too fishy
coz’ on the scourge of politics romance wouldn’t linger
someone jostled the line and jumped right in
lola kutty the mallu, Channel V’s language assasin
to her king developed a great affinity
like the one internal gas has for broccoli
but had to reject her coz she wasn’t full of sin
oh by now, his patience wore thin, the twitchy monarch
he hadn’t found any one with evil as their hallmark
in frustration he settled for dear nikhil
though not gay or female, indeed he was evil
and thats how on the 100th post he became a matriarch!
Congrats on your 100 posts! Am damn late in here, i know!
But still, YEY ! on the achievement and on the awards…
and
*I award this to: Scorpria, for being Scorpria;…*
Awwww…that’s damn sweet! Thanks! Shall display it with pride and pass it on! π
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My creativity is at a standstill right now…shall add tu yur story soon! Sorry! π
congratz man…u rock …
and congratz for ur award too …
and i will say the same what scorpria said..
creativity down to zero π
congrtas for ur 100th post and also for ur awards dude……………u really rock….
COngrats Nikhil….
Bravo moi Piggie! Bravo!
As for the story.
The queen couldn’t bring herself to love Greyhound. So Greyhound grows up to be a bitter person. She decides to run away from home but realizes that the public transportation sucks. So she steals from her Father and starts a bus service and names it after herself – Greyhound bus service. This bus service was overpriced since Greyhound felt the need to make the people of the world pay for her misery. She also ensured that Greyhounds (as the buses were called in time) operated only during weird timings with no regard for passenger comfort.
It was when people started thinking of Greyhound only as a bus service and no longer a person, that Greyhound couldn’t take it any longer. So she contacted MJ’s plastic surgeon, got a makeover (white skin et al) and participated in 2008 elections as McCain’s vice president – Sarah Palin!
Congratulations on your honest award! You are honest, and funny! Seems like you are the hottest new blogging sensation, with all these comments you get. Good for you, Nikhil.