It’s A Punny World! :)

Punny WorldMy first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow. Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn’t cut it. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn’t cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn’t note worthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn’t have any patience. When I finally got a patient, he woke up in the hospital and screamed, “Doctor, I can’t feel my leg! Help!” to which, I replied, “I know! I’ve cut off your arms!”

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn’t fit in. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income. I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.

And after reading this post, you’re probably going to experience Deja Moo – the feeling that you’ve heard this bull before. 😀

A good pun is its own reword.

31 thoughts on “It’s A Punny World! :)

  1. “Congratulations you have one, it’s a year’s subscription of bad puns” that I want…

    In quotes: Words of ‘Kurt Cobain’…

    but seriously u did some on on ur feet thinkin for this I guess… but m just guessing… 😛

  2. @Hope
    Curt Kobain was no gentleman! 😀
    And no, most of these puns are outsourced… 😀

    Yeah, it is! 😛

    Hehe! Yeah, thanks! 😀

  3. oh my godliness…..!!!

    it was amazing…i am a copywriter and i have to play with words all the time…

    and this one is the best…handsdown…

    keep posting such punny things…

    i dont think so it can get better than this… 😀 😛 🙂

  4. hee hee .. sounds like story of my life .. have u tried banking or selling laptops yet ? soul-enriching experiences , i say .. Deja mooo , it is 😉

  5. my god, did you come up this bullshit all by yourself?? you should be a jokebook writer or a copywriter! though the lameness of it may make your employee think you’re not of the write stuff. :mrgreen:

  6. Nikhil:

    I am a pun-kha of puns. A friend from IIMA and I meet and pun our way through the evening. If it weren’t for puns, my PhD on obesity would have drowned under its own weight.

    Childhood obesity is a growing problem.

    Pharma firms see jumbo profits in anti-obesity drugs.

    Miracle weight loss pill? Fat chance.

    Rolling stats suggest growth in obesity numbers.

    Effective weight loss therapies are thin on the ground.

    I have a whole document full of these but had to avoid using them in the thesis 😦

  7. “Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.” — Fred Allen
    I love puns 🙂 Good outsourcing 🙂

  8. @Blueandgrey
    LOL.. Thanks! 😀
    Most of this is outsourced, though! 🙂

    Hehehe! There’s a career option I haven’t tried yet! 😀

    I wish…! 😀
    Most of this is outsourced, with some valuable inputs from me, of course! 😀

    Haha! Yeah, I remember you’d told this to me sometime ago… Hehe! Good ones! 😀

    LOL… Good one! 😀

  9. Just to end with a kicker:
    “You finally took up a job at Mirror Cracked and, hell yeah, you did and are still doing a good job of making people crack with laughter.”
    Truly an awesome post …

  10. @Smita
    Hehe! Yeah, i swear! 😀

    @La Vida Loca
    Hehe! That’s a good one! 🙂

    Welcome back! 🙂
    Hehehe! I’m out of IT, thankfully! 😉

    Haha! thanks! 🙂

    LOL.. good one, thanks dude! 🙂

    Yup! thanks! 🙂

    Welcome to MirrorCracked! 😀
    Thanks for commenting! Keep visiting! 🙂

    Thanks! 🙂

    Yup, partly outsourced! 😀

  11. It was absolutely brilliant.
    One from my life –
    I hated computer languages until I realized that I could C-sharp. 🙂

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