Free Cat

Lately, I’ve been at a loss for words. There have been too many things happening in my life and I’ve not had the time to keep up on MirrorCracked. I’m sure you understand, when someone is so busy being lazy, he/she has little time for anything else.

So, until I find the time, motivation and patience to write a longer, more meaningful post on MirrorCracked, here’s a picture of a cat.

Cat Spine

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“Your Missing Comment” :)

Dear Mystery Girl,

I don’t know if you remember the first time we interacted. It was, like so many other hapless souls these days, over the internet. You commented on a post of mine and then accused me of deleting it. What started out as a friendly exchange of emails soon turned into a deeply meaningful conversation in which hopes and fears were shared.

We had not seen each other and we were already beginning to feel like we have known each other for a very long time.

Then we met. We fell in love but were unable to express it. You were unsure and I was still a kid. We made promises to keep in touch and drifted apart.

But the universe had other plans for us. We found each other again in professional avatars and we both tried to ignore the white elephant in the room that always loomed over us. Those unkept promises and those unsaid words of love and passion. We worked well together and achieved little, but it was always a pleasure to be around you. I haven’t met anyone else with whom I have shared so much. You know my deepest fears and my darkest moments. You are aware of things and people that depress me and you have helped me through my darkness.

We drifted apart when you mysteriously disappeared from my life. When I found you again, you said, “The people who want you in their lives will find you.” That made me smile.

We’ve laughed, fought, almost cried, smoked, smoked up and gotten drunk together. We’ve read, written and composed for each other. We’ve cursed each other and we’ve praised each  other. And even though we’re on different continents and separated by mountains, volcanoes and oceans we’ve sailed through it all.

Mystery Girl, you are a great friend, a fantastic woman and will always be the one that got away. I wonder what would have happened if we’d hooked up and given it a whirl. Oh well, if wishes were horses, I’d have a stable by now.

Yours always.

Me 🙂

Things Women Do

understanding women

Based on a true story. (Almost)

There’s this girl.. She’s in love with a boy. Now, the girl and the boy have been in love for quite a while and very recently, the boy popped the question and asked the girl to marry him. They’re both doing reasonably well in life with good steady jobs and a decent amount of money tucked away for the future. Now, when the boy proposed, the girl said, “Oh wow. I’m stunned. I need some time to think about it.”

Though he was a bit disappointed, the boy agreed and told her that she can take all the time she needs, that he really loves her, and all the jazz. A few days later, the boy asked the girl about where she was on the proposal, and she asked him if he was sure about it.

“What do you mean by that?” he asked, a bit confused.

“Are you sure about marriage? I mean, you hardly know me,” she said.

“But we’ve been together so long and I thought it was the right time to solidify things. I don’t want to get married immediately, but we could get engaged,” said the lovestruck, albeit disappointed boy. He had a sinking feeling in his gut.

The girl went on to explain how they were still too young to think about marriage and engagements and suggested that they both take some time to think about it. “It’s a huge deal,” she told him. “We need to be sure about this.”

The boy did not tell her that he was shattered and disillusioned, but put up a brave front and told her that he was ready to wait until she was ready. “We’ll make it work,” he told her. And life went on, with them taking one day at a time.

“I have an idea,” said the girl, a few days later when the boy broached the topic of the unanswered proposal. “Why don’t you marry my sister and we can have an extramarital affair?”

Jesus Christ. Women are difficult to understand, let alone live with. I wonder what the boy did.

Image Courtesy: Blaugh.com

Insane Trends For 2012

A while ago, I had educated the world about the famed Stupidity Index. Now, as we move into the new year with new hopes and renewed miseries, I will present to you my top five insane trends to watch out for in 2012:

Excessive 9gagging:

9gag logoOver the past year, 9gag has become a trend statement of sorts with all kinds of memes being made popular by a very large percentage of the world’s population. Being a 9gagger has become a matter of pride for some and a matter of principle for others. Excessive 9gagging has shown to result in involuntary drooling, day dreaming during work and sudden, inexplicable erections in men in January, courtesy of their no-bra campaign. This trend is insane enough to make this list and its worth keeping an eye out for.

Facebook Marriages:

Facebook_WeddingMore and more people are getting ‘married’ on Facebook these days. In 2011, there were 109 recorded marriages on the social networking site whose user base makes it the fourth most populated country in the world. If you like someone very much and want to get married to that person but can’t afford a wedding, then the the trendsmith recommends a Facebook marriage – change your relationship status to ‘Married’ and indicate the person you want to marry. Once that other person (hopefully your better half) has reciprocated this action, your statuses will be updated for the whole world to see.

This is a very useful recommendation for all those who are constantly broke. Go forth and get hitched. After all, being insane enough to get married in this day and age trumps the fact that you’re doing it on Facebook.

The Flash Mob Phenomenon:

Flash MobThe mob has many heads but no brains. Or so they say. The last four months of 2011 saw an exponential rise in the number of randomly arranged flash mobs in India, US, UK and Australia. Most of the flash mobs were centered around people dancing to or singing a popular trending song. This year, there are all the indicators that the Flash Mob culture will rise strongly and will involve people from all walks of life to behave like idiots for a few minutes.

Status Messages:

status messageThere was an astronomical increase in the number of people searching for the phrase ‘best status messages’ on Google. It’s probably the influx of innumerable brain alternatives that people these days are not able to think smartly for themselves. Sadly, some of the best status messages on IMs and social networking sites are re-hashed nonsense. One of the trends to watch out for in 2012 will be the hunt for an original status message.

Taking An Arrow To The Knee:

Arrow to the knee - skyrimSkyrim, with all its hype and drama, gave the world much than they promised. More than half the world’s population are nursing sore knees after being shot by arrows. This phrase, which evolved into a meme and now has grown into a full-fledged fan site, will not die quickly. 2012 will see growing popularity and acceptance.

So, that’s my list. In case you have more insane trends to watch out for, enlighten us in the comments. Cheers, and a happy new year to you all. Stay Hungover!