Umbrella Fella :)

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Almost Similar To Mine! πŸ™‚

It’s been raining cats and dogs in Bangalore for the past few weeks. Every day, like clockwork, the rain starts at around 5 in the evening and goes on till almost 10 in the night. This has forced me to avoid stepping out of the house/office, wherever I am, during this time period. Yesterday was an exception. πŸ˜€

A close friend had come down from Delhi and he was staying over at my place. Around four in the evening, we decided to get out of the house (Oh, I had taken a day off from work) and go window shopping on MG Road and Brigade Road. And as soon as we got ready to leave the house, God decided to water His plants. πŸ˜€

The rain did not stop for an hour, and around 5, when it subsided a bit, we realized that it would be utter stupidity to go on my ridiculously unreliable bike and settled on an auto. I grabbed the only umbrella in the house – an ancient monstrosity that can shield an entire football team when opened – and stepped out to hail the auto. We stepped out to bright sunshine and birds chirping. We looked at each other and contemplated the bike again, but decided against it as I had the feeling that God wanted to play with His favorite yo-yo. πŸ˜€

We got the auto and managed to squeeze in along with the huge umbrella and reached MG Road at around 6 in the evening. We walked around looking at expensive things and dreaming of being able to afford them. All the while, I looked like a clown straight out of a traveling circus, carrying the umbrella around. I felt so embarrassed when a couple of young kids started walking behind me making whooping noises. πŸ˜€

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Masala Dosa! πŸ™‚

Answering the call of hunger, we both entered a small wayside restaurant for some hot masala dosa and ate to our hearts’ content. It was a standing restaurant, and a very cramped one at that, and apparently quite famous, because the crowd was suffocatingly large. The steams from the tiny kitchen and the overpowering aroma of the food played contrasting tricks on my brain.

Finally, we emerged out of the restaurant and walked the entire length of Brigade Road, admiring the sights and sounds of the city’s most happening road. We watched as cops pulled people off their bikes for not riding with a helmet and we watched a ten-year-old kid buying cigarettes on the street. We saw the colorful advert hoardings screaming out silently for attention. We saw…

Oh shit, I had forgotten my umbrella in the tiny hotel! πŸ˜€

We ran back all the way and finally reached the hotel and I pushed my way through the hungry mob and those eating food, knocking over a freshly-made plate of dosas and reached the corner where I had stood. And there it was, nestled safely in the corner, just where I had kept it, standing as if there was nothing that could affect it. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and picked it up and caressed it and apologized to the umbrella for forgetting it. It forgave me! πŸ˜€

Images Courtesy: Neatorama.com and Woodland USA

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The Foodie Meme!

The word “food” evokes in me a primal instinct to mark my territory on the table, crouch in a corner with my plate of food and growl at anyone who comes near. I devour my food quickly lest someone steals it from me and smack my lips and return to my normal state of mind. I black out when eating, and sometimes, don’t remember what happened. I once came out of such a black out with the thumb of my left hand in my mouth, my white shirt covered in chocolate sauce and my hair smelling of onions. It remains a mystery till today! πŸ˜€

Shefaly tagged me with this very interesting food meme, and finally, I get to show off my love for all things edible. I would best describe my culinary afflictions as: “I am, therefore I eat!” πŸ˜€

Now, lets get down to the meme, shall we!

1. What’s your favorite table?

I wouldn’t want to go over the edge and make a big clichΓ© of myself by saying “Any table with food on it!” or something on similar, drab lines. Actually, my favorite table happens to be in the corner of a cafe called Barista, on MG Road in Bangalore. It was at this table that I was sitting when I realized that my life was going in no particular direction (but down) and that I had to do something about it. So, I ordered a cold chocolate, went home and got a haircut.

2. What would you have for your last supper?

I am going to die on November 4th, 2078 at 3.49 in the evening, while walking down the road after my routine sessions in the local laughter club, where I will perform for free, just to get rid of the boredom. My heart will have weakened enough for me to say my last goodbyes that day in the club, and that afternoon, my last meal will comprise of two chicken sizzlers on BBQ sauce and a portion of potatoes. I will drink half a glass of wine and choke on the other half, and finally, realize that its time to walk out of the club one last time…

3. What’s your poison?

Keeps changing with my mood and the season, and right now, it has to be roadside Dahi Puri with extra sweet on it. For more information on Dahi Puri, take a deep breath, smack your lips in anticipation and please click here. πŸ™‚

4. Name your three desert island ingredients.

Imagination, Perseverance and the ability to eat anything remotely edible! (PS: Cast Away was supposed to feature me, but they chose some guy who was a lot thinner than me and a disgrace to foodies all over!)

5. What would you put in Room 101?

Leftovers! πŸ˜€

6. Which book gets you cooking?

No book can get me to cook! God forbid, if I cook, I shall be responsible for mass hysteria and will be arrested for intentional food poisoning! πŸ™‚

7. What’s your dream dinner party line up?

Me..! πŸ˜€

Ok, I was kidding… Dream dinner party would consist of… um… uh… let’s see… no, I think it would still be me!

8. What was your childhood teatime treat?

Tomato juice, followed by salted biscuits and half a potato bun! Sometimes, when I’m feeling a bit nostalgic, I still follow this ritual. πŸ™‚

9. What was your most memorable meal?

December 2008, New York City, Lexington Avenue, Shravana Bhavan – That meal was perhaps the best because the whole day had been spent walking around the city and my feet were aching so badly and my insignificant breakfast had long been digested! πŸ˜€

10. What was your biggest food disaster?

My roomies and I once decided to cook a South Indian delicacy called Bisi Bele Bath. Its a concoction of rice, dal and lots of spices. We called everyone over and were so proud of ourselves, when we realized that we had forgotten to add the dal…

We made up a story that we got the recipe from MySpace, and that the dish was called Ranatunga! πŸ˜€

Some people actually bought the story and liked the dish. Never been near the kitchen since!

11. What’s the worst meal you’ve ever had?

My very own insipid version of chicken soup! πŸ˜€

12. Your food hero/food villian?

The food in my hand is the damsel in distress. She cries out for help and begs for mercy from the huge villain, who wants to eat her alive. The hero is no where to be seen. The villain lifts the helpless damsel and brings her close to his mouth. She can smell the foul breath and see the remains of her brothers and sisters sticking to the villain’s teeth. “Hero! Where are you?” she screams. Her screams are in vain. The villain devours her.

13. Nigella or Delia?

I don’t know what either mean and as long as they’re not some exotic, tasty food items, I don’t really care! πŸ˜€

14. Vegetarians: genius or madness?

Paranoid and morally confused! Plants have life too, you freaks! πŸ˜€

15. Fast food or fresh food?

Edible food!! πŸ˜€

16. Who would you most like to cook for?

I can’t think of anyone who has a death wish! πŸ˜€

17. What would you cook to impress a date?

Hmmm…

18. Make a wish.

I wish every living being in this world can taste Tiramisu before he/she/it expires.

19. I tag…

Namrata, who would be doing her first tag with this one! I wish her all the best! πŸ˜€

Fruity, who seems to be bored enough and senile enough to be tagged! πŸ˜€

Suda, who seems to have gotten all techie all of a sudden! πŸ˜€

Meghana, who would be doing this as her first tag on wordpress! πŸ˜€

Rekha, who is, like me, from South India and her answers would give me a clue to my sanity! πŸ˜€